
When I handed in my manuscript of Spartacus: Swords & Ashes, I decided to call myself J.M. Clements. I thought it would be a smart move to stop Amazon spamming everybody who’d bought one of my non-fiction books and expecting them to like my fiction, too. I mean, they might. But I figured Spartacus is for Spartacus fans, and my name on the cover shouldn’t influence them one way or the other.
“It’s pretty obvious who you are,” sniffed the Editrix. “It’s about as likely to fool the public as Iain ‘M’ Banks.”
“I know,” I said. “And I’m proud of the book. I’m just trying to keep fact and fiction in separate areas. I hate it when some douche on Library Thing decides I shouldn’t be allowed to write about one subject because he thinks I can only write about something else.”
“That’s stupid,” said the Editrix. “That never happens.”
“It always happens!” I protested. “And they’ve got a particular hard-on for people who switch between fact and fiction, which people often do if they write for a living. I dread to imagine what these one-track people are like in real life, as if they don’t think it’s possible to be a father and an insurance salesman, or a Saturday footballer and a chef. They probably have conniptions if they have to do two things at once. Then they review themselves and say: ‘I cannot possibly walk and chew gum, for those activities are mutually exclusive. Worst gum-chewing walk evarrr.’”
“You are over-reacting,” said the Editrix.
“If they ran the world,” I ranted, “they’d say Neil Gaiman could only write about Duran Duran. Lynda la Plante would be good for nothing but Rentaghost. Robert Silverberg could only write popular history. And Tolkien can piss right off and stick to Anglo-Saxon etymology.”
“All right,” sighed the Editrix. “Have it your way.”
The next day, the Editrix was back.
“The distributors want to know about the other things you’ve written,” she said. “It’s so they can tell booksellers how brilliant you are.”
“But won’t that make it really obvious who I am?” I said.
“Yes, probably,” she said, without pause or apology.
So I told her about The Destroyer of Delights, which was a Doctor Who audio I was very pleased with, which had a recurring subtext about the nature of slavery. And since there were lots of fights in it, I thought that my Highlander story Secret of the Sword, was probably worth a mention. I decided it probably wasn’t worth bringing up the biography I once wrote of the president of Finland. He doesn’t crop up much in Spartacus.
A day later, the Editrix was back again.
“The distributors want to know where you live,” she said.
“Jupiter’s cock! Why!?”
“They like it. Their sales people like being able to say, ‘he’s a local boy’, to a bookseller near you.”
“But isn’t it more productive if everybody thinks I am a local boy?”
“Do not question the House of Random!”
“All right, all right.” So I told her where I lived. It felt a little bit like I was handing over my bank details to a Nigerian prince.
All of which meant was that by the time Spartacus: Swords & Ashes was up on Amazon, some bright spark had already worked out precisely who I was, and it was listed with all my other books. My attempt to carefully separate my fact and fiction had failed again.
“I’ve got a translation of The Art of War coming out in the summer,” I protested. “But shelvers at book-stores are going to look me up online and order their copies on the basis of the sales of this novel, which is full of sword-fights, swearing, rape and adverbs. It will be the most heavily over-ordered classical text in living memory.”
“You say that,” said the Editrix, “like it’s a bad thing.”
J.M. Clements is the author of Spartacus: Swords & Ashes, available now in paperback and on Kindle. He has written a few other things, too.
Gaius Verres was an asshole. He persecuted the Roman citizens that he was supposed to be ruling. He exploited a disaster on the mainland in order to line his own coffers, by accusing locals of harbouring escaped slaves. A man who stood up to him was so badly beaten that he died from his injuries. Another was crucified in sight of the mainland, taunting him with the knowledge that he died almost, but not quite out of the jurisdiction of the man who’d had him killed.
And so my neck-deep wade through Japanese-language books on anime has continued, most recently with the NTT collection of scholarly essays
I’d believe it if NTT Shuppan had not answered within the year with an all-Japanese collection. There is no question about the anime book of the year 2011 — that award surely goes to Anime Studies, edited by Mitsuteru Takahashi and the omnipresent Nobuyuki Tsugata. Anime Studies contains ten chapters of detailed commentary on many interesting areas in the anime field, including education, intellectual property and national animation policy. The authors include academics, but also producers and directors, most notably with a chunky section from Ryosuke Takahashi about Tezuka’s anime “revolution”. Anime Studies is the book to which I wish every Western scholar had access, laden with charts and diagrams explaining the way that modern anime works, but also with informed references to peripheral areas, and, that greatest rarity in books on anime, a functional index.
Anime directors continued to be feted with studies and analysis, notably in books about
You’ll notice, perhaps, that many of the books have dully typographical covers. In a country where Japanese studios will often charge magazines even for illustrations used to accompany rave reviews, the studios are often their own worst enemies when it comes to picture sourcing. I am pleased to note that the current crop of Japanese academics and scholars have simply given up playing the studios’ game, and instead published the texts that they want to publish, without bending over for outrageous fees or assenting to textual tampering — here’s a hello to the idiot who tried to get us to lie about the production details of his company’s movie in the
There is still a good deal of pretension awash in the anime field. A
In this periodic round-up, which I have previously run in
Big corporations are introducing a new job title, the Customer Experience Officer or CXO. His or her job? To understand the “journey” that customers make to buy a product. One suspects that the acronym came first, with some bright young marketer wanting to spiff up his business card with something that looked a bit like “Chief Executive” to the uninformed. If I were feeling cynical, I might even suggest that the entire position is little more than a rebranding exercise to keep companies spending on a particular kind of consultant that doesn’t necessarily do anything. The duties of a CXO, at least on paper, are the sort of thing that any company worth its salt really ought to be filing under “competent marketing.”